How do many of you feel about helping?

I have only ever left a party once. It was an Aurum Vale run, and I was already in a bad mood. We wiped on the first boss three times and nobody would eat the Morbol fruit. However, I felt bad after leaving, and I've never done it since.

With that said, I will always stay with a group from now on. If you want to vote abandon? Fine, I'll go along then. However, if nobody wants to quit, I won't either.

As the last active member of a once populated and proud Free Company, I now roam Eorzea helping other PUGs make their way through the Duty Finder to clear their trials and tribulations. Because, and I speak from experience, playing alone is difficult and it's hard to progress when you're going solo all the time.

I like helping those I know. The virtue of helping random people eventually wears out its welcome without a sense of return for your efforts.

And some ideas of "help" just isn't welcome at all.

[QUOTE=Synrin;3561059] ...[QUOTE]

So yeah you do expect something still out of it, whereas I dont. I do it because I want to and because helping is a great feel. Doesnt mean I will allow you to abuse of that. Also, not wanting to run something that makes you uncomfortable is not refusing to help is just not wanting to do something that potentially could make YOUR run unpleasant.

Sometimes, denials arent done because of selfishness...but maybe is me though...we both of us will simply agree to disagree or disagree to agree !!

i pretty much agree with what cloverkitty said. i started the game with the launch of ARR and leveld all the jobs fairly quick to understand what each job is able to and understand what they are about.

now when i saw someone not using a skill that is a mandatory (DRGs heavy thrust, BRDs dots,...) i mentioned that they should be using it. that sadly often lead to them getting all salty and i also got insulted multiple times for just trying to help them and that made me simply stop caring and thinking "fine do your rotation wrong if you like, you'll run at one point into someone that won't try to explain it to you nicely and instead flame you". then there was a similar thread not too long ago, which mentioned that it also is about how to approach it. i tried what i read there and instead of just giving the advice i asked if they're open for some advice and it seems to work a lot better.

i just had yesterday a really new WHM (not even 3k HP cause no job gear for whatever reason) in my level50 roulette which was wanderers palace. everyone who plays since ARR knows that this is where the masspulling began and since i'm an overgeared tank i had no doubt he's able to. in the end he panicked on the first pull and healed a DD instead of me, i died the rest survived and we moved on. i paid attention to what he's doing till the first boss and then asked if he's open for advice and then said what i had to offer. the rest went pretty smooth and he even gave me his comm, even though i didn't go easy on him with my pulling.

about non pug ppl, depends who asks what i'm up to and if they keep asking 24/7 for ppl (i'm no babysitter, but help if i can). i even recently opened a linkshell with the only goal to help new ppl with whatever they need, it slightly is a LFG channel but still provides help to those that need it

I'm quite happy to help people, I never leave an instance because someone is new and I'm happy to give advice and guidence about fights for new people. I've also spent many hours crafting and penta melding for FC members. I have learned though that people will absolutely take the piss and that's when my support stops. Friends might be slightly different but for random FC/DF members I usually like to see that they're at least prepared to help themselves too. If someone is not trying to learn a fight, I wont break my back trying to teach them, I'm happy to make leve turn ins or gear but not every day for all your classes from level 0-60.

I love helping people, and I often go out of my way to give others a helping hand. And I'm very stoked for the Mentor system. I don't expect anything in return, other than becoming friends. ;o; I need friends... *cries* Erm, anyway. I try to be as genuine as possible when helping and/or providing advice, as I don't want to come across as condescending. But the amount of defensive players I encounter who are incapable of taking any sort of criticism is... staggeringly high.

My bullshit threshold is very low though, and I don't like to be taken advantage of. In those cases I tend to just go somewhere else and avoid conflict entirely.

In my 2 years here I think I've "rage guit" twice (like eat the 30 min penalty) can't remember 1st but 2nd was doing Arboretum & I was not informed about the "Burn hunnycomb & run" stratagey (as I wasn't warned by them & hadn't herd about it before by others) wasn't in the best of moves as their WHM healer due to standing in AOE's & lack of warning so I left after 2nd boss without a word/warning... felt bad about it cause few runs later I now am okay about eather way (burn wall or adds) but at the time if I had typed a responce it would have been mean so best I just left.

As for helping ppl I'm usually game & will stomach multi-wipes as long as those helped are legitimetly learning/trying but wait I can't stand if ppl expecting u to help without asking & trying to guilt trip u if u don't... basicly I'll help but ask first if I can

I will generally always help friends or friends of friends, but I tend to avoid jumping into random PFs and things like that. It's just hard to know what kind of experience I'm going to have that way. When I get new folks in Roulettes, it's about 50/50—some days I'm the one to explain important fight mechanics and sometimes I'm not. It depends on the sort of mood I'm in at the time.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by MeiUshu

I do it because I want to and because helping is a great feel.

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See? That is selfish. You do it for your own merit. I do it too. I help randoms I will never see again, be it in Duty Finder or doing some random FATE I stumble upon. Because later I feel nice.
If you want to give your utter best you will do things that you find dreadful. So the guy who didn't want to do Thornmarch is a) not a helper b) not as thankful as he should be c) selfish as all of us other motherduckers
If I help someone by giving them 2h of my time, then it would be nice if they did the same for me. If they don't, then that tells more about them than me, now doesn't it?
The point being, which I find quite obvious now, is that people are selfish, and always will be. They are even selective helpers. I will do it if I feel like doing it and/or it has a benefit.

How I think others see me when I help people:
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com...293da597b4.gif


How others actually see me when I try to help people:
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-neT2kwtc4y...nions+Gifs.gif

What actually happens when I try to help people:
http://25.media.tumblr.com/71716cc59...taoio1_500.gif

How they feel when I try to tell them good try after endless wipes:
http://www.lovethispic.com/uploaded_...nny-Quotes.gif