"Everyone's so open and friendly" is a lie

Outside of weird folks sending me creepy tells, the only negative experiences I've had are with Mentors with an ego.

The vast majority of the people I ran into have been absolutely lovely.

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Originally Posted by Razdazim

After having been here since June or July I can say this is the biggest lie that this game's player base tells and I am sick of it. This entire problem is promoted by the heavy handedness of this games harassment policies, making it impossible to have fights and arguments in a attempt to resolve problems that instead encourages passive aggressive behavior that is just as detrimental if not worse. At least when there is fights and arguments people know where another stands, what the problem is instead of attempting to ghost and being child like. If someone has done something wrong, no matter how petty one may perceive it no one is allowed to be critical.

I am absolutely disgusted, and I hate this concept of people wanting to talk, be social and make friends one minute but without warning having done nothing people suddenly refuse to speak. It's flat out hypocritical and disingenuous.

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I have had mostly positive experiences in-game. And having played games like WoW and ESO, the latter of which has a surprisingly toxic community, FFXIV's community has by far been the best. I would say second best community I've ever personally encountered. The first being LOTRO back in the day.

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Originally Posted by Lium

I have had mostly positive experiences in-game. And having played games like WoW and ESO, the latter of which has a surprisingly toxic community, FFXIV's community has by far been the best. I would say second best community I've ever personally encountered. The first being LOTRO back in the day.

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Agree. Lotro has an awesome community as well. Have never had one issue there.

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Originally Posted by Ferra

Outside of weird folks sending me creepy tells, the only negative experiences I've had are with Mentors with an ego.
The vast majority of the people I ran into have been absolutely lovely.

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+1 - The amount of creepy people DMing me was a lot more rampant back in the Spring for some strange reason. I had to report one after I blocked them because they were too explicit. I still have the screenshots.

But most people are like "Hey! I love your glamour! Where did you get it?" and I'm all about that life right there. That's how potential friendships are formed.

Though I have trust issues in terms of who I invite into our FC these days. Nothing so bad - just recluses that won't ever participate in a mount farm or jump on our Discord to shoot the breeze. They just... exist. And then leave.

At the very least this community is certainly no better than any other online gaming community imo. This is the second most popular subscription MMO right? The notion that it somehow attracts entirely different kinds of gamers in an MMO market that is so devoid of games has always been funny to me.

People are afraid of being punished so it leads to this kind of behavior. Then there's also the aggressive white knights and enablers who take things to the other extreme, because surely if they're being aggressive and crappy, they won't get in trouble or called out for it because it's for a good cause.

I've also heard some stories about the crazy amount of drama and toxicity that arises in the RP community.

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Originally Posted by Razdazim

"Everyone's so open and friendly" is a lie

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It's true, I would like more than 200 blacklists.

So I have to send people to learn how to play for 200 blacklists.

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Originally Posted by Razdazim

This entire problem is promoted by the heavy handedness of this games harassment policies, making it impossible to have fights and arguments in a attempt to resolve problems that instead encourages passive aggressive behavior that is just as detrimental if not worse. At least when there is fights and arguments people know where another stands, what the problem is instead of attempting to ghost and being child like. If someone has done something wrong, no matter how petty one may perceive it no one is allowed to be critical.

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Or you could simply talk out your problems politely and respectfully, like an adult. There's a middle ground between bashing someone over the head with their grievances and refusing to speak with them entirely. You don't need to have fights and arguments to have a relationship with someone or to know where everyone stands. Living with someone who thinks you do (like my mom) is exhausting enough IRL. I can't even imagine regualrly playing a game with someone who feels that way.

It ... depends what content you're doing.

While you're still going through the MSQ, the likelihood of finding a jerk is almost zero.
If you're trying to do Extreme/Savage, *especially* if you are in no way ready for Extreme/Savage, you'll find some angry people.
Areas that attract 100+ people in the same shout channel will have at least one jerk spamming it, guaranteed: Hunts, Bozja, the Limsa Aetheryte.
And PvP and RP attract the same types of problem players they can everywhere else.

All that said, it still *is* by and large a very open and friendly community. At least compared to the alternatives.

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Originally Posted by Jennah

It ... depends what content you're doing.

While you're still going through the MSQ, the likelihood of finding a jerk is almost zero.
If you're trying to do Extreme/Savage, *especially* if you are in no way ready for Extreme/Savage, you'll find some angry people.
Areas that attract 100+ people in the same shout channel will have at least one jerk spamming it, guaranteed: Hunts, Bozja, the Limsa Aetheryte.
And PvP and RP attract the same types of problem players they can everywhere else.

All that said, it still *is* by and large a very open and friendly community. At least compared to the alternatives.

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I was also going to mention that. The type of content is a big contributor to the type of behavior you might encounter. For normal dungeons and trials and the MSQ people are by and large chill. Even if we wipe for some reason.

However, for more high-end content like savage/ex dungeons and trials, your mileage may vary because the expectations are higher.

I’ve experienced most of my toxicity in normal dungeons rather than ex or savage tbh. Moreso because it’s the toxic casualism and enabling that’s the issue. People in endgame dungeons not knowing their rotation or knowing to aoe/dps on healer etc. And then trying to tell them what to do and they get aggressive and it’s counted as “forcing your play style on them.” Yikes.