Why did mmo's become so anti social and friendly?

I'd say the blame lies on both the game and the players. We as a community have become obsessed with efficiency, and that doesn't lend itself to socialise. We farm dungeons for gear and tomestones, we farm fates for atmas, and all the time we're just running from one fight to the next, never stopping to talk.

The style of the fights in the game doesn't allow time to talk either. There's always a button to press, an ability to dodge... and that doesn't go well with typing. Maybe an integrated voice chat could help with that, but then again it would also add a new level of social stress for the most introverted or those less fluent in the party language.

I believe the game needs to add something that allows people to work together toward their goals, while giving enough pauses to allow people to talk. The Lightning fates worked for me, for example. I joined a group to farm the different weapons and in between fate spawns we could talk and get to know each other a bit better.

If you study social behavior you learn that 'social activities' are the 'backdrop' to socializing. They offer a platform in order to achieve the main goal of socializing. For example:

You go to a fun fair not to win as much loot as you can, but to have a place where you can socialize with your friends and do fun activities together.
You play games like Monopoly or Badmington not to win (unless you are mean), but as a way to socialize and have fun with your friends.

However, FFXIV, is not like this. It does not place socializing front and center, and serve merely as the platform with which to have socializing fun. It serves as the main attraction, that you focus on. Before/After you can socialize about it, but not while engaged in the actual activity.

To bring back that full old-school socializing behavior may not be possible for FFXIV. The best we can hope for is some minor improvements here and there, mostly in the area of deterring anti-social behavior (or at least better enabling social behavior).

I like being social with players, but I've never like the idea of spending 14 hours or 36 hours to do a signal battle or quest, or raid. I like spending time doing more then just kill things, and to have time to do other things in real life if I need too. I don't mind spending a few hours doing a task with a group, or role playing though. Thats one of the reasons I never got into FFIX, because it was too time consuming.

The real reason is because everyone wants to decide what "fun" is for everyone else. Both Casuals and Hardcores are guilty of trying to force their playstyle onto each other.

This is not just in MMO's; every single game in history will have this effect on people. Take the example used by the post above about Monopoly and such. He states that people only play those games to have fun and socialize. You're "mean" if you're playing the game to win. For some people, winning is fun. They enjoy winning and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

The hardcores and casuals just need to learn to get their heads out of their bums. Leave each other alone and just play the game how you want to play it. It's not SE's fault, this game actually lends itself really well for both camps to stay out of each other's ways. It's the people who want to perpetuate this silly feud. It's like politics.

It's the reason many people have already said: DF and lack of connecting with people. I try to have conversations and many times it's great fun talking to people, but it's a chore because you are on the move all the time. Coupled with the fact you have like a 10% chance the person is on the same server means you will most likely never see them again. So there isn't really a reason for people to talk or get to know each other because after the duty, as you'll never see each other! This also is the same with assholes, who don't have to worry about repercussions.

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Originally Posted by Skyhound

Take the example used by the post above about Monopoly and such. He states that people only play those games to have fun and socialize. You're "mean" if you're playing the game to win. For some people, winning is fun. They enjoy winning and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

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'He'?! You need to socialize more if you can't tell difference between girl and boy ^^. Obviously for some people winning is fun. But the point is that the game was not designed to cater to those who want to win, but rather, cater to those who want to have an activity to do while socializing.

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Originally Posted by RNageo

I'd say the blame lies on both the game and the players. We as a community have become obsessed with efficiency, and that doesn't lend itself to socialise. We farm dungeons for gear and tomestones, we farm fates for atmas, and all the time we're just running from one fight to the next, never stopping to talk.

The style of the fights in the game doesn't allow time to talk either. There's always a button to press, an ability to dodge... and that doesn't go well with typing. Maybe an integrated voice chat could help with that, but then again it would also add a new level of social stress for the most introverted or those less fluent in the party language.

I believe the game needs to add something that allows people to work together toward their goals, while giving enough pauses to allow people to talk. The Lightning fates worked for me, for example. I joined a group to farm the different weapons and in between fate spawns we could talk and get to know each other a bit better.

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yup , i dont knwo "when" nor "why" , but we as mmorpg players stoped working together and started working against or ignore fellow players

Just 2 days ago a pld was tanking a fate and died just before the fated finished, no1 raised him (not even the 3 smn in the party ,how hard is to swiftcast + raise?) , i was on brd , and was writing on chat , hold on changing job to rez u....(he returned sadly) ,he thanked me and we talked about it , not even party members that u have been playing the whole evening with, will raise u....

On the other side i had a friend on FFXI that traveled 30 min just to raise me , i was camping a NM , in the end of the world lol (only spawned on full/new moon >< Sbow if u know the rabbit :P)

A random stranger on jeuno, helped me to get the 3 keys to kazham (i helped him later on ^^ , and we exped toguether and made some bcnms ,chatted ...)

i remember ppl helping on Genkai quests all the time just for the sake of community. Helping a random shout in jeuno for AF key /mission ect. (yeah there was ppl that sold some fights , fenrir for example )

in FFXIV ,is rare to get help from others that arent your friends , even FC members wont help u if they dont get anything from it :rolleyes:

It's the New World Order.

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Originally Posted by Asiaine

'He'?! You need to socialize more if you can't tell difference between girl and boy ^^. Obviously for some people winning is fun. But the point is that the game was not designed to cater to those who want to win, but rather, cater to those who want to have an activity to do while socializing.

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I didn't realize you made Monopoly.