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Really creative thread OP, no one's been bold enough to say quite like this in the game's decade-long lifespan, I salute you.
(I hope you stub your toe repeatedly, actually)
It's true. You get like 35 of them throughout the MSQ. It's enough for all of the MSQ as well as all of the side quests inside the Waking Sands and the surrounding area.
Even if it wasn't though. Set your Return to Limsa, use the aethernet there to the Arcanists Guild and the ferry to vesper bay is literally right there, and it's like 30 seconds slower maybe.
The Garleans are able to tap into link pearl messages, as has been demonstrated by Nero in Praetorium.
So sure, go ahead and tell the Garleans about your deepest secrets on an unsecure line. No worries.
Your personal dislike of Minfilia as a character is noted. <shrugs>. I guess you wanted to do all of the paperwork of running the Scions of the Seventh Dawn yourself? That would have certainly been a different game for A Realm Reborn.
You can't reason with these people they've already decided Minfilia is effectively the game's true villain for... minorly inconveniencing them, even though all the characters back in ARR were more or less equally 'useless'. Unlike the rest of them though, Minfilia never got the benefit of extra screentime after ARR to clear her name. The devs gave up on her...
Warrior of Light: *Does literally everything*
Minfilia: "We scions did such a great job!"
Minfilia: Does absolutely nothing
Warrior of Light: Does absolutely nothing, since there is no administrator of the Scions of the Seventh Dawn, and an entire expansion is spent randomly doing fetch quests.
If you're really not seeing this, ask yourself "What was Nick Fury doing for the Avengers?" Nothing. Except helping move the plot along. Otherwise, the Avengers would have spent entire movies doing random fetch quests.
Minfilia was an administrator, not a warrior. If she could take to the front lines and handle it all herself, we would've been out of a job.