Fair point, ill keep that in mind. Wait an see house the housing plots change when the transfers come along.
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I did this a couple years ago when I returned to the game, and I would not recommend it. The gil wasn't worth the hassle. Not being able to play with your friends/partner is pretty annoying. I guess it's fine if you're staying on the same data center, but I honestly don't think it's a good tradeoff for the inconvenience. Gil isn't that hard to make.
As for your questions...
As soon as you transfer to the same server as your bonded partner, the bond goes back to normal (as long as you don't throw away the ring). While you're on different servers, the ring maintains its appearance but doesn't do anything.
You demolish the house but don't relinquish the land. Remove any furnishings you can before doing that - the ones that you can't retrieve once placed are the reason you get 3 mill gil from the transfer. This was a hassle imo. You can't keep the items in housing storage or anything; they have to be in your inventory or your retainer's inventory. Depending on your inventory management and how much furniture you have, you may have to do some serious purging.
It will be wiped and you won't get it back. EDIT: Sorry, I mixed this up with the blacklist. Just don't delete the 'unable to retrieve' from it and I think it should be fine?
This I can't answer, because at the time when I transferred the gil offer was only good if you went to a new server or to a preferred server from a congested one, so the lockout was three months. I assume this is the case, but no other way to confirm than to try it and see what happens.
I wondered if there is a 30 day wait if you have more than one character to move or can you move them all? No intention of moving back to the old server. Like can 2 different characters transfer same day or is there the wait?