Sad experiences of a newbie

AST can be a pain to balance when new. Did you buy the level jumps? If so, that's half your problem, you're lacking what you'd learn early on. (Yes, I know the jumps don't apply to AST level, but early game healing is all similar enough.)

Maybe you're just in the wrong class? Try SCH.

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Originally Posted by Cherrytop

I play on EU and tend to go for very populated servers (I don't like waiting for my queues for very long), I actually have no idea if queueing in this game is cross-server or not.

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It is cross server and so is the party finder tool (lets you build a pre-made group).

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I'm used to more traditional healing model - me, a healer, just heal. From the garbage thrown my way I gathered I'm supposed to dps too. Apparently for most people I healed too little, dps'd too little, then healed too little, then dps'd too little... you get the idea. I admit, I'm a slow learner, and learning how to juggle healing, dps and buffs (I decided to focus on astrologian) is tough for me, since I don't get a lot of time to play in general.

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That's a very fair assumption to make, as this game is particularly strange in its design.

As a healer you are expected to DPS. The reason for that is because on average the healing required in 90%+ of the content in the game can be handled by very few button presses leading you to have a staggering amount of downtime. I've recorded healers in DF who did not DPS being active less than 20% of the time. Imagine if the tank or DPS's were only active 20% of the time? That wouldn't be a very fun run.

In all your leveling did you never feel like you were kind of just sitting still doing nothing a lot of the time? Were you filling time with healing people at 90% HP that didn't need to really be healed? In this game outside of combat passive regeneration is incredibly powerful so when you spend a lot of time keeping HP bars at max (when it's not needed) you end up wasting that benefit.

The reason why the community is hostile over it is because the difference between a healer strictly healing and a healer who DPS's is insane. That said, in no circumstances is it ever ok to harass a player over this. I'd be really curious if you remember what they specifically said. If it was truly vile, it's definitely report worthy as we want you to stick with the game.

I'd be glad to help you personally, but unfortunately I am on NA. I am sure some EU people would love to make it up to you.

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Originally Posted by Cherrytop

I play on EU and tend to go for very populated servers (I don't like waiting for my queues for very long), I actually have no idea if queueing in this game is cross-server or not.

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The way queuing works in XIV is it's based on data center. So anyone on the same data center with you is a potential party member if they are queuing for something in the same roulette scope/same dungeon as you are. Sometime, unfortunately, you will run into people like the ones who you have already met, but more often than not, there is practically no chatting in dungeons aside from the initial hello and final thank you. Of course there are exceptions, but that goes with everything.

I'm not sure if it was because of the data center, time of day, or just bad luck getting people who honestly have no patience to help new players. But, it typically does get better(sometimes it takes a transfer off the center to not be a part of that).

Healing can suck even for people who have been playing the game unfortunately, i blame Gordias but that's a whole different story in itself lol

I would suggest maybe starting off with a dps to get familiar with the mechanics of the game but even than you will get blasted for low dps But generally tanks and healers recurve the most flack which aucks...

But try getting with an FC and running dungeons with them now a day's pugging dungeons as a healer or tank is an absolute nightmare

I'm sorry to hear that. I personally only had good experiences when trying to learn tank or healer (when I was brave enough to go without FC mates), but I also made a point to communicate with my party in the beginning, something like "apologies in advance we're probably gonna die! :D if anyone has any words of wisdom feel free to dump them on me." There's bad apples all around, but usually the truly impatient will leave if they realize they have someone that doesn't know what they're doing haha.

tbh I don't think you should give up. Find an FC willing to teach you, meet people that can help. Reroll as a DPS for first runs if it'll make you feel less paranoid.

Oh hey, another “random people on the internet are jerks” thread. Given some of the OP’s phrasing, I believe there’s more to the story.

Sorry to hear about those bad experiences. Most of the time people aren't that bad, though sadly it does come up from time to time. If you do decide to continue pursuing the game, I definitely recommend that whenever you're new to a dungeon or fight to let your party know at the start. Most people will be understanding and answer any questions you have. Some will even take the time to explain mechanics and anything else you need to know without prompting if they know you're new. And if you still have a bad apple who complains about it, then they're probably not worth your time to contemplate anyway. Not everyone likes to do this, understandably, but it also helps sometimes to check guides on certain content beforehand to give you an idea of what to expect.

If you feel like you need to spruce things up playing a job, there's tons of job guides online written by people who are pretty well-versed at their jobs that can give you insight on how those jobs should be played. The most relevant ones will usually be geared toward the endgame, so if you're new to the job and still leveling there'll be skills mentioned in them that you won't have access to for a time. But nonetheless it'll give you an idea of what you can do in the meantime as you progress, as well as what to expect of your job once you reach the level cap. You don't have to research BiS, fully-optimized rotations and such immediately, of course, though you certainly can if you're interested. Between the forums and Google, you should be able to find something helpful. Other than that, talk to people, join a FC guild with similar objectives and interests, ask questions, practice, and try different things out whenever you're comfortable to find out what kinds of jobs or content are ideal for you. Most importantly, have fun!

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Originally Posted by Cherrytop

I play on EU and tend to go for very populated servers (I don't like waiting for my queues for very long), I actually have no idea if queueing in this game is cross-server or not.

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Well I'm sure if you ask around you can find another FC that will be nice enough to do runs without you rather than using DF. DF is cross server (but not cross data center. There are multiple data centers each with multiple servers)

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Originally Posted by Cherrytop

I'm used to more traditional healing model - me, a healer, just heal. From the garbage thrown my way I gathered I'm supposed to dps too. Apparently for most people I healed too little, dps'd too little, then healed too little, then dps'd too little... you get the idea. I admit, I'm a slow learner, and learning how to juggle healing, dps and buffs (I decided to focus on astrologian) is tough for me, since I don't get a lot of time to play in general.

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While I do understand that as I came from WoW where healing is more ...healy :D, didn't you feel there were times when you didn't really need to heal and could maybe put in some other things?

Even in WoW, once a piece of content became super easy and we were basically in farm mode, I'd be asked to either switch to DPS spec (and let the other healer solo heal) or throw out a few things here and there while staying in healer spec. Maybe my group was unique in that way, and it certainly only happened once we reached "farm"-like conditions and not for any content where we were actually working hard, but it did happen. I definitely remember doing this on the first 2 bosses of the lich king raid many times.

Anyway, unless people are doing high-level content and you're trying and not just standing around (and not spamming heals when everyone is pretty much already topped off), it shouldn't matter if your dps is super high, most people will be content to just see you try. You can always try doing it gradually.

Comfort level -1:"I'm not trying" (hopefully you're not here): I'll heal when I feel like it but I'll do nothing even when no one needs healing for multiple seconds at a time and just watch videos or something.
Comfort level 0: I'm active but the only thing I'll do are healing spells and mana regeneration. Nothing else.
Comfort level 1: I'll heal whenever I feel I need to, but I'll at least keep one dot up as much as possible
Comfort level 2: I'll heal when people get < 70%, keep one dot up, and throw attacks out when above 70%
Comfort level 3: I'll heal when people get around 50%, but other wise keep learning to dps. If I'm playing a class/job with more than one dot, I'll try to make sure they're both up and also throw occasional attacks.
Comfort level 4: I'll see how far I can push it while not being overly stressed out.
Comfort level 5: END GAME: I'll see how far I can push it as long as we don't die even if it stresses me out :D

These comfort levels can change for each instance, and depending on how good the rest of the group is, but the idea is to try to work towards the highest level possible.

I would also recommend finding someone in NN or FC to practice casting heals on to get a feel of how strong your healing skills are so you can best determine if it's necessary to heal or if you can wait a bit and throw out another Stone.

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Originally Posted by Cherrytop

I'm used to more traditional healing model - me, a healer, just heal.

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WAIT WAIT WAIT stop this!

you know, I'm in the same server I'm a main healer, never had a complain.

They could be more sympathetic and polite, but I'm sure 99% is your fault.

This game has its own rules, you cannot "spam heal" and think "i'm doing fine". You aren't.

My advice is "begin from level 1" as conjurer -> whm or arcanist -> scholar and understand every skill
Another good advice is "try to play as tank or melee dps", you will see how others play the healing class.

P.S. I play healer in WoW, in Lotro, in RIFT... everyone is different.

Part of it, too, I believe is the fact that they sprout you get as a new player is on a per-character basis and not a per-account basis. This ends up meaning that you can't distinguish a genuinely new player from an alt, and so people don't really pay attention to that anymore.

Healing in XIV has always been a contentious thing when it comes to multitasking between healing and DPSing. Personally it's the role I level last because it's the one I least look forward to. I do manage to heal and DPS well when I get to it, but it's always stressful. Unfortunately much of the community is in the "my precious time" mentality and can't stand to have a second of it wasted by someone else. Sorry to hear that it got to you so badly, but the DF has always been a place you're more likely to have a bad experience than a good one until you've really got a handle on how to play your role effectively.