I really would like to tank, but

My early tanking days were quite funny. The very first thing I tanked was titan extreme, followed shortly by t5. I experienced a lot of trouble with that, thankfully I usually ran with my fc at the time, or it would have been much worse. it really does get better. Much better. And the wod gear is very good, if you throw in some poet accessories for the accuracy. Just whatever you do, don't give up. You'll get better, and people will stop being d**ks, but it's sad that you have to meet some unspoken standard to not get hate.

I feel your pain. I hit relic quest, spirit bonded in northern than for gil, then spammed the hell out of ST for gear. About to spam Wod, fairly anxious going in. But nothing 20 or 30 runs won't take the edge off :)

I main DPS but am seriously thinking about my Tanking career... certainly the abuse sometimes one get as a Tank is unreasonable... but the 30 mins penalty from leaving a dun is good time for crafting :v

Dont give up XP

In CT raids, just be lazy and wait for someone else to main tank, then offtank in Sword Oath. There's no point trying to MT those places undergeared (which, by current standards, appears to be anything less than 30 ilvls above the requirement) because people will just rip aggro off of you without even trying, and that's assuming the other tanks aren't going to be dicks and try to pull aggro off you on purpose.

I think I went into my first WOD as a tank dead on 90 ilvl, zenith relic and still using half my AF gear. The rest of it was strength accessories I'd previously farmed on my DRG plus some random tank items I'd won on greed rolls. Went fine, picked up some drops, and after a bunch more runs was 6/6 WOD drops in the space of less than a week.

Do some WODs, do some ST for tomestones and sands, get yourself the 110 weapon and shield and you should be fine from then on. It's just getting over that intial hump in the gearing process that takes a little effort.

Thanks for the kind words of encouragement. They're pretty needed.

So since it looks like I'm going to need to get a 110 weapon, should I save up my soldiery tomes for a new weapon, or upgrade some jewelery? I know i have the allagan tomestone and sands to upgrade the sword, but would I not need better jewelery?

Most tanks go vit, which is unneeded for the most part, so unless you're trying to stack strength, the jewelry won't do much of anything for you.

Your Sword and Shield is your #1 priority in upgrade because their contribution to your aggro generation is much much more than that of jewelries/accessories.

As others said, go for a weapon ASAP. will greatly help you.

As for people being pricks... It's best to just ignore negative comments that have no criticism to them and do your best to fulfill your role.

If someone is being critical of you for doing/not doing something (such as using provoke to pull being the most common criticism, not that you do) ask them to explain if they don't give a reason as for why to or not to do so. If the answer is logical (some sadly aren't), incorporate what you learned into your game. Some people come of as asses when they are really trying to help (reader's perception of tone and whatnot).

Not sure if its an option that is viable for you, but you could also try the JP servers.

On JP servers (at least on Tonberry), the culture is somewhat different. The tank usually drives the run, the healers as co-drivers and the rest just chillax and enjoy the ride. Whether the tanks decide to do full runs to help non-synced players maximize exp for leveling or just do speed runs, there's usually no quarrels or discontentment and everybody defers to the tank and just plays along even when nothing is said by the tank before the run starts. In fact most tanks are pretty happy to oblige to do a full run for extra exp as long as they're specifically asked at the start (politely of course).

In 24 man raids, the B alliance tank is always the de facto MT, sort of an unspoken rule (but that can be adjusted if the B tank says in the alliance chat he's relinquishing it). Deference is always given to the B alliance MT, and the other tanks always control their aggro output to ensure they don't unintentionally grab it off, unless for some reason they're required to take it up eg. the MT dying etc. Alliance chat is mostly reserved for the 3 alliance's tanks and to organize the parties and all other communication between the tank and parties are in their party chat. You won't find people barking orders across the alliance chat or just filling up the alliance chat with text that is irrelevant.

In the DF such as the coils, if the run/party turns out to be really bad, the party just simply tries again and again until the 15min mark, disbands and reforms. My experience with abusive behaviour has been fairly minimal so far. That is not to say, just go in unprepared, but if for whatever reason things don't work out, you usually won't find people talking down or acting abusive (at least I've never encountered or observed it happening so far).

So as of right now, I have half the soldiery for the DoW sword, which Im savin up for, but I've got 500 poetics.
I've been lookin around and I've not really found a definitive answer between the noct hoplon and the magitek shield. is the magitek shield worth getting or should I save poetics for gear/accessories?

Also, good news, managed to OT ST without getting yelled at, also, not sure if I was complimented but the main tank was losing aggro to me and the other tank said "If you're losing aggro to B tank then we have a problem." So I'll take that as a compliment lmao