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Totally agree, and I have a similar background. I try to encourage people and walk them through new dungeons, etc as much as I can. It's kind of a personal accomplishment when I can take three other newbies (tank included) through a dungeon for their first time and beat the shit out of it. And I know they had a great experience. That's ultimately a lot more rewarding than running with people like the tank you described. I still think the overall difficulty is a little much for most people though, and not everyone can learn beyond a certain point of speed and agility.
Sorry, the only analogy of yours that works is Oil and Water, as a lot of people like ketchup on steak and scotch on the rocks.
I feel you. It's a matter of balance. I don't want the game to be a faceroll, but I also don't want it to be Dark Souls punishing. Right now it feels like the current perception of the majority is the latter. I could be wrong. This is all based on observation - but either way based on my actual death toll, it's very much a reality.
The game is cake leading up to Titan HM. Once you hit him and beyond, everything is a gear, reaction speed and eventually coordination check. As intended. I mean, every server is using pick up groups to occasionally successfully clear parts of coil, so it's pretty clear that there's nothing excessively difficult about the game.
That said, you lose some credibility when you play the easiest damage dealing class. You are literally the least important person regarding the success of nearly every encounter.
To you it is. To me it is. To a lot of people, it sure as hell doesn't feel that way. And as far as importance, how the hell is being the "strongest damage dealing class" the least important person? I'm pretty sure killing things is reliant on you know, taking damage. And if we're really digging into that, a 20% reduction in magic resistance and a mana pool refresh isn't exactly useless.