Compare a 75 DD to a 90 DD.
Now compare a 75 Melee Rdm to a 90 Melee Rdm
So yeah while Rdm melee gear might have improved I can safely say that pretty much every other job except Blm, Sch, and Smn has received more powerful melee gear then Rdm.
So excuse me for not being exactly enthusiastic when every other job found bill gates credit card in their christmas stockings. Sure we got something too, but finding coal in out stocking compared to everyone else is hardly a buff.
And really, when reading your post of what you do in an average party I couldn't find one thing that a Blm/Whm couldn't do nearly as well if not better then Rdm in those situations.
The only advantage Rdm would have over Sch/Whm and Blm/Whm for what you are doing is MP management and there are bigger issues in your party if you are running out of MP.