I think so. Firstly your use of the word gaijin shows how ignorant you are. Why put quotation marks around it? Are you trying to suggest it's a bad word? Because it isn't. Foriegners aren't offended by the term, in fact we tend to use it to refer to other foriegners as well when speaking in japanese.
You are wrong that Japanese don't respect someone because they are a foriegner. They won't respect someone if they're an asshole, but is that not true of everyone? Japan is like every other country in that there will always be assholes. You can not base your views of a whole race off a few assholes. It would be like saying all americans are red neck idiots who thought the march earthquake and tsunami were revenge for pearl harbor.
If you act courtious towards them, then just like european or american players, they will be mostly courtious and respectful back to you.
If most japanese players you have met dont respect you, maybe its time you realised that the problem is not them, but its you and you should stop being such a clot.