I know it's been beaten to death but...

[Kagato]

As silly as this topic is, even I think "kitchen" remarks are stupid.

[Atomic_Skull]

If SE doesn't allow same sex marriages in Vana'diel, they certainly aren't going to allow transsexual elves.

[Greatguardian]

The reason it's difficult to blist some of them is due to the fact that some of us have genuinely gotten along and they've helped me a lot. There's a guilt factor to it because of this. Getting along with someone wonderfully and then having them act inappropriately towards you is difficult to handle, it feels surreal almost, you sit and wonder if this person really just said these nasty things to you. It's hard to take action when you want to remain friends with some of these people but feel unsure if they'll speak to you in such a way again. I hope you can better understand now that I explained it better.

Also, I normally don't tell people my gender at all, I let them assume. S,o I don't really flaunt my gamer girl status around as you think I do.

This is no different than real life. If you feel legitimately harassed, you cut ties or you call the cops/GMs. Period. Cyber-stalking IS a criminal offense and if you do end up in a bad situation you also have the option of, you know, calling the real police.

It's not SE's fault, however, if you are unable to stand up for yourself because it is a friend who is harassing you. This happens every day in real life and people either choose to accept the that their friends had no intention of causing them harm, talking to them, and resolving the problem, or that their friends are fucks and they need better friends. Part of being an adult, of both genders, is being able to handle yourself around other people. If someone says something that you really don't appreciate, you tell them they don't appreciate it and they need to stop now. If they keep it up, you choose to either ignore it or accept that this person obviously does not give a crap about your feelings and does not need to be your friend.

[rog]

This is no different than real life. If you feel legitimately harassed, you cut ties or you call the cops/GMs. Period. Cyber-stalking IS a criminal offense and if you do end up in a bad situation you also have the option of, you know, calling the real police.

It's not SE's fault, however, if you are unable to stand up for yourself because it is a friend who is harassing you. This happens every day in real life and people either choose to accept the that their friends had no intention of causing them harm, talking to them, and resolving the problem, or that their friends are fucks and they need better friends. Part of being an adult, of both genders, is being able to handle yourself around other people. If someone says something that you really don't appreciate, you tell them they don't appreciate it and they need to stop now. If they keep it up, you choose to either ignore it or accept that this person obviously does not give a crap about your feelings and does not need to be your friend.

As someone who does not give a crap about anyone but myself, i am offended by this. What is wrong with being friends with someone simply because they are fun? Why does someone need to care about you to be a friend? Plenty of people (myself included) would define a friend as something like "someone you enjoy being around". I do not see a (strong) relationship between the two things. Just because someone does not care about your feelings does not mean they are not funny/cool/etc, and enjoyable to be around.

Just sayin'.

[Gennadi]

I have the same issue people make fun of my hair, or the lack of it. Why cant we synth hair tonics that make your hair thick and full of life?

Just look at this example of how my dream hair would look like /sigh

http://usera.ImageCave.com/nphulk/ffxi2/dreamhair.jpg

[Meyi]

I had the same hatred of playing a female elvaan, but for different reasons.

I started over. It's not so bad anymore. Pretty easy to get a new character to 90 again and redo storylines and such. I had my Elvaan for 7 years, but I love my taru far more. ^^b

[Tamoa]

I'm also female in rl and I have played this game a lot longer than the OP. And I have to say, sexual harrassment has never ever been a problem. I don't hide the fact that I'm female. If people I don't know call me "dude", say "he" when they talk about me, or tell me "hey man", I correct them (can't stand being called dude, lol). And despite this, I have never been subjected to sexual harrassment.

Flirting =/= sexual harrassment. If you are so overly sensitive that you perceive harmless flirting as harrassment, you have a problem imo. And if some guys that you are friends with, suddenly do a 180 on you and get all nasty, tell them to stfu and if they don't, blacklist them. It's quite simple really. As Greatguardian already said, stand up for yourself.

[Greatguardian]

As someone who does not give a crap about anyone but myself, i am offended by this. What is wrong with being friends with someone simply because they are fun? Why does someone need to care about you to be a friend? Plenty of people (myself included) would define a friend as something like "someone you enjoy being around". I do not see a (strong) relationship between the two things. Just because someone does not care about your feelings does not mean they are not funny/cool/etc, and enjoyable to be around.

Just sayin'.

Pff, I'd agree completely on a personal level but it's fairly obvious that the OP does care. Either they don't give a shit about rude comments, or they do and are intentionally subjecting themselves to them by either not representing herself or by refusing to remove herself from the situation(s) that result in such comments.

The point was that it she does have some responsibility of her own to handle the situation. GMs and the police are there for when the persistence of the other party does become a criminal act.

[Saefinn]

I've not witnessed sexual harassment in the open in the game (unless you call my joke flirting with other guys sexual harassment, in which case, a gender change won't help you, if you're on Asura at least), but I don't doubt that it happens, I mean you've got all sorts of people playing including sexually frustrated losers. Sure changing your character's gender will mean people won't know you're a girl, but why should you hide the fact you're female? I'm sure you could report to the GMs, if they don't do anything, then we should be asking for SE to get their butts into gear and do something about it. If their users are being sexually harassed and SE aren't doing anything about it, I'm sure it won't look too good on SE's record, particularly if somebody starts talking to a lawyer.

[Tamoa]

But that's the thing though - you don't have to put up with sexual harrassment in this game, you can just add people to blacklist for whatever reason you like. And if you give people your phone number/real name/address over the internet and they end up stalking you - well that's your own fault. This isn't a workplace where your employer can get into trouble by allowing sexual harrassment to take place. This is a game we all play of our own free will.