I don't think FFXI is hard in anyway or really has ever been.
The hardest fight for me, outside of AV, was the omega CoP fight when you were capped.
As for grinding, in my opinion when implemented well it's an awsome thing, for example old nyzle isle climbing the higher you got the more you wanted to play or abyssea or VW clears the more you grinded the stronger you got.
My issue is stuff like New Nyzle and Meebles.
With New nyzle you can either do it or you can't and even though i got 15/15 in like 2 months, it saddens me that i couldn't help out some of my friends because he/she may not have the geared job or getting the other 4 took too long considering the likly hood of failing. If people could of taken 2-10 runs to get a peice 100% of the time (excluding wipes or not exiting in time) I would of enjoyed it more.
Then with meeble i just wanted to play it not wait 20 hours a day to play 10 mins /sigh.

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