Well to be perfectly honest imo there are not many good RDMs around. RDM is fairly good or bad, depending on the work put in and the level of your gear, if most people look at RDM & see it as subpar for most things then yes its going to be poorly geared by them & its not getting much of anywhere, but if you gear it up well enough it can put out. RDM is the 3rd best healer atm, SCH 2nd thanks to Rapture & Regen, WHM 1st thanks to Cureskin, and I suppose Cure V if its needed. DD power for RDM is not uber amazing, but Req has given it good numbers, Dia 3 does not only increase the RDM's DD, but anyone meleeing, which makes it more valuable, and buffs admittedly RDM loses in basically every way to any other job except in the case of Phalanx & Refresh if needed.
Imo RDM's don't get praise when another job is doing bad, but rather when the RDM is doing good. Often times you can see looking at the party as a whole if the party itself is whats sucking, or if the party is good and the RDM is simply keeping up. If everyone is bad & the RDM is keeping up then the RDM is doing nothing special, I mean yes, they are keeping up with bad DDs, but thats nothing, however if the party is doing well, and the DDs are DDing properly, and the RDM is able to keep up still, then the RDM is doing something right, rather than the others doing something wrong imo.
I may have taken what you said wrongly, idk, I admit I'm tired & I took sleeping meds about 3 hours ago so I wouldn't be all to surprised if they are fuckin with my head atm, but I hope that came across right. In the end when it comes down to it, RDM can offer very little that no other job can do, and in Alliance situations like VW or Legion, that does hurt the job, but thats why lowman things like Meeble Burrows make it shine, it can fill a healer role & a DD role in 1, it can even play crowd control a bit if need be, it can do none of this as well as other jobs, but it can fill them still, and when your party only can consist of 6 people it helps to have 1 player fill 3 roles instead of only 1.