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  1. #1
    Player
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    105

    FFXI Limericks (Read for fun!)

    All in the name of good (bored) fun! I do not mean to offend any job or any one with these poems. They are simply jokes and fun things that I came up with in my spare time today. I am going to attempt to make one for every job, so here are the ones I have so far. Feel free to make up and post your own! (We all know its more entertaining than VW or NeoNyzul)


    There once was a Paladin from Bastok
    Who thought he was big-man on the block.
    He talked lots of trash,
    Hit people with Shield Bash,
    But then a worm killed him with Rock.

    There once was a Thief who wanted infinite wealth,
    He stole from people and exploited his wealth.
    But he changed jobs to COR,
    Gambled and went poor,
    And ended up Quick Drawing himself.

    Long, long ago, a Red Mage loved kiting,
    Also found he excelled at healing and fighting.
    But then the level cap raised,
    And he scrambled for days,
    Only to find the job now uninviting.

    There once was a Black Mage named Kiro,
    Who wanted to be a casting hero,
    But his gear was dishevelled,
    For he Abyssea levelled,
    And ended up nuking for zero.

    There once was a blinded Ranger,
    Who put everyone around him in danger.
    He used Wide Scan to track,
    Barraged people in the back,
    Until he got Blinda from a stranger.

    With a GreatSword to zerg, but without Resolution,
    This Dark Knight attempted to find a solution,
    Soul Eater, Last Resort, and the likes,
    For extra good measure he put up Dead Spikes,
    But when fighting the mob, he just kept on "whoosin".

    There once was a SAM from SE,
    Who ran around WSing with glee.
    But when he started to cry,
    SE asked him why,
    And he said “please overpower me.”

    Scholars studied for years locked in towers,
    So out in the world facing dangers, he cowers,
    Compared to other mages, he'd sob,
    But SE decided to improve his job,
    And now Scholars are awesome every two hours.

    There once was a PUP who got really offended
    When fighting a mob over and over he got bended.
    Cus he was taking damage to the face,
    The puppet kept trying to erase,
    and SE just said “Working as intended.”

    There once was a healer who let everyone die,
    Party members got mad and started to cry.
    No armor did he don,
    And he stayed /anon
    For he was WAR/WHM, thats why.

    There once was a Monk who used a staff,
    Everyone around him began to laugh,
    So he threw it away and put up a fight,
    Knocked every one of their a$$es out right,
    Now he partly uses fists, but a pole the other half.


    And finally~

    There once was a man from Square Enix,
    Who rose FF up like a Phoenix.
    But then he got the sack,
    Tanaka came back,
    And now the only fun is these Limerix.
    (12)

  2. #2
    Player Alerith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    282
    Character
    Alerith
    World
    Cerberus
    Main Class
    PLD Lv 99
    To the tune of Row Row Row Your Boat:

    "Stab, stab, stab the mob, poke him in the eye!
    Kick his ass and take his cash, make his mother cry."

    This also happens to be my Madrigal macro.
    (2)

  3. #3
    Player Saefinn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    San d'Oria - Asura
    Posts
    259
    Character
    Saefinn
    World
    Asura
    Main Class
    COR Lv 99
    Lol, love them, some are pretty accurate too. XD Love the SCH and PUP ones especially...no bias, honest!
    (1)
    Saefinn on Asura
    Main Jobs: Corsair: i117, Scholar: i117, Monk: i117, Summoner: i117

  4. #4
    Player Seriha's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    982
    Character
    Kalsena
    World
    Sylph
    Main Class
    BLU Lv 99
    I tell a tale of Red Mages who wish to melee,
    But no one would let them have their way.
    Given a life of Refresh, Haste, and Cure,
    Told it is all you're good and meant for.
    Question that? Many insults your way for sure.
    (1)

  5. #5
    Player Duzell's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    111
    Character
    Duzell
    World
    Leviathan
    Main Class
    DRK Lv 99
    Quote Originally Posted by Savlyn View Post
    There once was a man from Square Enix,
    Who rose FF up like a Phoenix.
    But then he got the sack,
    Tanaka came back,
    And now the only fun is these Limerix.
    There once was a man from Square Enix,
    Who rose this game up like a Phoenix.
    But he got the sack,
    Tanaka came back,
    So instead of fun we have balance.
    (5)

  6. #6
    Player
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    105
    LOL

    I really wanted to end that with "balance" actually, but for the sake of the rhyme... xD Although mine isn't any better
    (0)

  7. #7
    Player
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    214
    There once was a place called WoE
    Waiting to enter felt slow
    Coins for upgrades were bait
    And an hour you'll wait
    For 5 minutes to fell your foe

    There once was an event called Voidwatch
    This event the Developers did botch
    The event was a bore
    Dropping nothing but logs and ore
    Viewing spoils was like being kicked in the crotch

    This is the story of Dynamis
    In this place players did hiss
    For a THF would train mobs
    Despite the players sobs
    And all the mobs could do was miss

    A few I came up with waiting for Namtar. Anyway they are ment to be funny and not cause arguments or discussion. (I'm aweful at these kinds of things so I hope I did a decent job)
    (2)
    Quote Originally Posted by SpankWustler View Post
    In the FFXI universe, the down of Phoenix is so fine that it quickly broke down into a sort of dust. Smaller than dust, actually. A barely visible particle.

    This down was carried by the winds of Vana'diel. Some people breathed it in and contracted Phoenix Downs Syndrome. Some of those people post on this very board.

  8. #8
    Player Kristal's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    1,552
    Character
    Kristal
    World
    Bismarck
    Main Class
    PUP Lv 99
    Puppetmaster used to be lame
    But then the pupdate came
    Now the maton is pure win
    Spamming Phalanx and Stoneskin
    Lolpup is dead, PÜP is the name!
    (4)
    "Puppetmaster was our last best hope for peace. It failed.
    Now it's our last best hope.. for victory!"

  9. #9
    Player
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    105
    Haha awesome guys! Zinato, those are great! Don't worry ^^ I'll post some more later this afternoon.
    (0)

  10. #10
    Player Meyi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Seraph/Bismarck
    Posts
    725
    Character
    Meyi
    World
    Bismarck
    Main Class
    BLM Lv 99
    These are amazing. Keep them up! I bet if Spank came in here he'd have quite a few hilarious limericks to add.
    (1)
    Quote Originally Posted by Greatguardian View Post
    ^_________________________________________________________________^

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