Ok using the same ideals you use.
Player A doesn't want to gear corectly, but wants to do X event.
Player B is doing X event and player A ask to joins. After looking at players A's gear, player B doesn't allow player A to come.
Player A calls player B an elitist, pretty much player bashing player B because he doesn't want the burden of player A.

How is this acceptable for player A to call player B an elitist and not for player B to call player A a poorly geared player?