I sincerely wish you were a happier person. You should probably take a break for a few weeks, you come across like you might have your priorities a little messy. Sometimes a short break is all it takes to cure that.
I'm really not trying to troll you or start an argument, you get enough of that from everyone else. I genuinely do not like seeing people with some underlying psychological issue- I'm not saying you're dumb, crazy, or anything like that at all; it just seems like the game might be effecting your attitude in a very negative way. I recognize it only because it's happened to me before.
