Being Gendered Correctly

[Kimmy_Dee]

My character name is a female name. My character is female. Yet I still get people calling me "he" in chat every time.

Not only is the assumption that I apparently "must" be a guy rather insulting, but it's also kind of a painful one. I'm a trans woman. Being called "he" really hurts, and playing a female character with a female name should be sufficient to get gendered as female. And if people aren't sure they could at least ask.

Pretty much the only thing I could do about this beyond what I have already is start off every party with, "By the way, I'm a girl." Not only does it feel obnoxious and tedious to have to do, but I'm well aware of how many in the gaming community react to someone being visibly female.

But overall? If you can't be bothered to ask, please just gender based on avatar. It's far simpler and less insulting than assuming every player is a guy.

[jars]

everyone on the internet is a G.I.R.L.(either way you're misgendering a lot of people)

[Rennah]

As a female gamer as well, I'm really tired of this. Stop assuming that I'm a man. Generally, I assume character gender = player gender unless proven otherwise, and have NO problem giving a gentle correction when that happens when I'm playing one of my boys...but girls? Really? Yes. We exist in gaming and MMOs. So please stop assuming we're all men.

I'm sure someone will pop in with "It's not a big deal, get over it"...but when you've played many MMOs and found this attitude to be the most prevalent, yes, it does get tiring. Just because we're used to casual sexism in games doesn't mean that it's not exhausting to put up with.

[Muzy]

There's no real need to be insulted, keep in mind, many people properly name a character, even if they are not of the same gender as that character. Sayin "he" is more a general catch all now when meetin someone new on the internet, no one is trying to hurt your feelins, it's more just a generic term applied to someone, since most people have a hard time thinkin in genderless terms, which would be over all more equal...

[Kimmy_Dee]

It's not a general catch because it's an assumption. If you want to go gender neutral, use "they".

[Purrfectstorm]

Sorry, Kimmy, this happens to me all the time. Sometimes it annoys me to the point of correcting the person but most of the time I just grit my teeth and ignore it. Even if you say you're a woman, there's a good chance some won't believe you. It is extremely sexist to assume that "everyone online is a man until proven otherwise." I recently did a research paper on game addiction and read a report that 31% of adult gamers are female. This may be a far cry from equal representation in the game world but it's still a lot more than no percent. Not everyone has to know that I'm a woman, most of the time it's not important, but I always shake my head whenever someone calls me "bro" because that assumption is always there.

[Luxx]

It's not a general catch because it's an assumption. If you want to go gender neutral, use "they".

i wouldnt let this bother you at all. many MANY times i would think someone is a girl, they correct me and say their a guy,
even in their female character or vice versa. i am in no way trying to hurt feelings though.
just correct them and go abt your day. :c sorry i am not trying to be mean or anything
but is nothing to get upset about.
but have a hug to feel better:

[Muzy]

Again, most people tend to only think in he or she, not with gender neutral terms, I'm not sayin it's right, but more pointin out, that's how people tend to think.

I personally do use they when referring to someone I don't know in game, but that was developed over time.

[Pantz]

Believe it or not, no one is being personal.

It's just how some people are used to just using "he". Especially on the internet where you have no idea who the person behind the character is. Just politely correct them. Type "*she" when they use "he" and most would be willing to correct themselves. Those that make a big fuss out of it are just childish and you should just ignore them.

[Shamo_Lomenzo]

I am male, and I used to play a game where classes were gender locked. The mage class was locked as a female character, which I reluctantly played, as I would rather my character's gender be the same as mine. With that came the use of female pronouns when people referred to me in chat. It used to be annoying, but on the internet, especially when partying with random people in dungeons that don't last more than an hour (this was the case on the game I used to play as well), people don't care whether you're a male, female, trans, etc. It's just one thing that you learn to ignore.

TL;DR: You're probably never gonna see these people again so don't sweat the small stuff and move on.